In anticipation of this week’s Bears/Packers throwdown, I looked up the rivalry’s history in order to see if any predictions could be made for this Sunday, seeing as these two teams have danced their dance a paltry 827 thousand times.
But my research shied away from the numbers and more towards the stories. Crazy stories. Things you would never dream of happening in today’s NFL. Here were my findings:
November 23, 1924 – The first ever ejection during an NFL game happens when the Bears’ Frank Hanny and the Packers’ Walter Voss were tossed as their bickering led to punches being thrown. Naturally, in 1926, Hanny was ejected again during a GB/Chi tilt.
November 2, 1941 – An undefeated and seemingly unstoppable Bears team was defeated by the Pack 16-14, leaving Chicago fans accusing the NFL of fixing the game, pointing to the Packers’ “secret” defensive scheme. Unfortunately, after this upcoming Sunday, the Bears might be voicing these same complaints about Dom Capers.
December 14, 1941 – In the only other playoff game between these two teams, the Bears took out the Pack 33-14 en route to their fourth NFL Championship.
1962 - I hate to say this, but the season ended with the Packers scoring an insane 87 points against the Bears in their two matches, compared to the measly 7 by Chicago. Halas spent the entire offseason working on his revenge, and revenge he did get, by winning the Bears’ 8th NFL Championship the next year.
September 13, 1964 - Apparently known as the “Free Kick Game,” the Packers took advantage of a little known “Fair catch kick rule,” where a team can place or drop kick a field goal from wherever the ball was caught. I had to read that four times before I actually believed it was a rule. Right before the half, the Packers made a 52 yarder post fair-catch, stunned the crowd, and went on to win the game by 9.
November 3, 1968 – The Bears did it back to the Pack with some dude named Mac Percival and won by 3. Boo ya. After this day, all children, male and female, born in Chicago on November 3rd, were declared legally bounded by law to be named Mac Percival.
August 7, 1971 – Packers quarterback Frank Patrick pulled an Orlovsky, running out of the back of the end-zone, giving the Bears the only points of the game. 2-0 finale.
September 7, 1980 – The Packers lined up for a game-winning field goal, and Chester Marcol’s attempt was blocked by none other than Alan Page’s head. Yes, his head. The ball bounced right back to Marcol, and before anybody really knew what had happened, he marched into the endzone, ending the game 12-6.
December 7, 1980 – One of my favorites. Bill Tobin, the Bears’ VP of personnel at the time, came up with a monster game plan to destroy Bart Starr, giving the Bears a 61-7 victory, the most lopsided in Bears/Packers history. Why was this so cool? Because Tobin was fired by Starr two years prior and, before this game, was ordered by Bears management to study and decode the Packers’ quarterback symbols. Easily surpasses the “Best Revenge Move Ever” Award your buddy’s gave you when you banged your ex’s sister.
October 21, 1985 – Ditka mixes da Fridge with da offense. Nuff said.
November 10, 1985 – Alright, I’m no Packer supporter, but this one is pretty gnarly. During this tilt, DT Charles Martin of the Fudgepack wore a towel with several Bears players’ numbers written on it, like 34 for Walter and 9 for McMahon. Later that game, Martin leveled McMahon after an interception, separating shoulder from body and quarterback from football career. McMahon was never the same. The suspension for menacingly searching out injury-inducing hits in pre-meditated fashion? Just two games. Goodell would end a career mafia-style if that happened circa 2011.
November 5, 1989 – A bunch of complicated shit happened involving replay, resulting in Ditka ordering an asterisk to be put after the game’s result in the paper. I didn’t even know they had reply in 89.
The 90s – Brett Favre beating us a lot. Um. Next.
November 7, 1999 – Bears honor the loss of their hearthrob RB Walter P. by blocking a potential game-winning field goal by the Pack, winning by a point. Screw you Packers.
September 10, 2006 – Since I mentioned a hefty six words about Favre’s dominance of the 90s, I should point out that on this fine day, the Bears handed Mr. TextyPants his first shutout ever. 26-0. In yo face.
December 22, 2008 – Monday night. Holy shit, it was cold. I was at this game and wore 78 layers and drank plenty of whiskey with my friend Douglas, who carried two flasks into the game, just to keep his little ducklings warm. True gentleman. Oh, and the Bears came back from 14-3, blocking a game-winning field goal, and ended up winning in overtime on some Good as Gould action.
January 23, 20…
Yep. So that about covers it. Every important thing that’s ever happened between the Bears and the Packers. Nothing to see here folks. Just looking forward to Sunday and whislting awkwardly and alright, gotta go.